Bridal Club Magazine
How to Avoid the Post-Wedding Blues
I definitely believe in marriage, in a surprising life, fully
connected with your beloved and blessed by God in a gracious union.
Anyone with the same beliefs would think that a bride and a groom
can't wait for the beginning of their story as a married
As a matter of fact, here starts the problem: the onset of
Surprised? Dear newlywed couples, marriage is not simply about
the wedding and the preparations. Don't get me wrong: they are
important. However they are not crucial for your married life, or
for your life as an individual, in its entirety.
Generally speaking, depression is a big problem, especially
nowadays. Compared to a less successful wedding, depression is an
issue that may deeply affect your life, with critical impact not
only on your family life but on your mental and physical
One in ten women experience depression in the
first year of marriage, and the number of couples seeking
post-nuptial counseling is on the rise says Psychology
Top 3 reasons of the post wedding blues
1. Not thinking about your life as a couple after
Maybe you've lived together for a while before deciding to get
married. Maybe you think you know each other very well. Maybe there
are no secrets for you regarding one another and you believe all
this will bring you what you need to have a happy life.
All these are important, but the list is incomplete. It is
simple: living as lovers is quite different from a life as husband
and wife. Being just lovers means you are not bound in any way,
means you can practically leave the boat any time you feel like and
gives you the moral freedom to do anything you want as an
individual, not as a couple. Psychologically speaking, you don't
see the other one as your half.
Marriage is totally different, compared to "lovers" statute. It
brings together two people, with different background and
education, that have planned to have a life in common in all
possible ways, without the moral freedom to leave anytime one feels
the hard moments (of course, we are not talking about physical or
mental aggressive patterns or other similar situations).
2. Excessive dieting to reach the supreme measures
90-60-90 on the big day.
For good or bad, many see it as desirable to look as a model,
especially on your wedding day. But this is not a standard for
either happiness or a long-lasting relationship. Remember:
happiness and how to work together to keep a long relationship are
the main objectives if you want a truly amazing marriage.
I know a lot of women who used to look very attractive before
marriage and on the wedding day. Then, out of the blue, in less
than a year, they started to look older and increased their weight.
Surprise: they were very unhappy. Why?
Maybe because they had relied on temporary things and not on
strong, inherent beliefs and a natural lifestyle.
3. The high costs of the event, or even worse, a dramatic
exceeding of the planned budget.
Over the years, I've heard a lot of my friends talking and
arguing about enormous amounts they dedicated to this event.
Indeed, it is an important day and it should go smoothly. However,
even if you have inherited a big fortune or you are the child of
some parents, expenses should not cross the line. More than that,
if lean on credit as a way to fund your dream wedding, you should
reflect even more carefully. The real burden of the expense will
come after the event.
Recommendations to help prevent the wedding
- Collect and record as many beautiful moments as possible from
your wedding day and cherish them together with your husband.
- If possible, book a trip within the next 3-4 months after the
- Consider a hobby, because the wedding planning kept you so busy
once and now you're left without any spectacular things to do. Find
- Keep your social life alive. Continue to meet your friends and
have a little time for yourself. Doubtless, you are one with your
husband, however some short moments alone or with friends will give
you the chance to miss one each other and feel you still have
Once you are out of the danger of wedding blues, think of a
happy marriage as one of the most important projects in your
- Understand you and your half are fundamentally different
persons, with irritating moments or habits. A ring will, in itself,
bring happiness, but in most of the cases, wisdom will come over
- Lower your expectations. Even if it may sound a little cynical,
it could be a wise thing to do. Love, in its very first moments,
tends to hide, let's say, those parts we don't like in someone that
will be certainly revealed when we less expect. Enjoy the
And one last piece of wisdom: never stop working on your
marriage. Together marriage is work in progress… until death do you